Real American Hero’s

Real American HeroesWho’s seen the ‘Bug Light’ radio ads? The one where they raise a tribute to a hilarious American stereotype? Such as ‘Mr Way Too Proud of Texas Guy’ or ‘Mr Gasoline Barbeque Starter’. Well, I have written my own! And it is as follows (Note: it would sure be easier to understand this with an LDS background):

This is to YOU!

Mr 45-minute church sermon giver.

You don’t need the Gift of the Holy Ghost to know that this week, everybody needs to hear about food storage!

Whether it be soaring grocery prices,

instability in the middle east,

or predictions of the rapture…

You have 1000 reasons, not to mention the real one:

because a modern revelation said so.

Your tips and tricks teach us how to drink contaminated water,

how to cook your own rabbit,

and most importantly how to keep the mice off your oh-so-important stash…

So crack open a fresh bud light, oh sultan of the sultana!

And then go pour it away,

because Mormon’s don’t drink, do they..?

If that has ticked your taste-buds as to why members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints are serious about self-reliance and emergency preparedness, you might want to try zapping over to Mormon.org.

I'm a Mormon.

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